Habits

A Single Eyelash: Remove the Misery

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A single eyelash. 

Pointy, sharp-edged, and almost transparent. 

As I sat in a church meeting with my precious eighteen-month-old daughter, I noticed this pesky eyelash standing like a thorn in the corner of her eye. Experience had taught me that if the little lash moved even the tiniest fraction of a centimeter, it would land in the sensitive area of her eye and cause real pain.

Resting in my arms with sleepy and trusting eyes, she allowed me to fish for the little lash. That stubborn, rotten lash seemed to evade my every attempt to remove it. 

It felt like an hour, but it probably only took five minutes for me to come out the victor. I was so proud of myself. I defeated the enemy and protected my sweet little one.  

I leaned over her, held out the little token of my love for her on my fingertip, and whispered, “Look what was in your eye.”

She focused all her attention on that itsybitsy lash of hers, and with a wave of indignation she snatched it from my finger and shoved it back in her eye. Into the same exact place I so painstakingly removed it from seconds before. 

No joke.

I look back on that day and laugh. I mean . . . what are the odds that a toddler could put her little challenge right back into the precarious spot it began?

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But then I think . . . how often do we do just that? How many times do we struggle with some sort of problem, while answers are all around us . . . yet we become offended at the truth and choose misery instead? 

Natural laws cannot be changed. They are simple truths. And we know dozens of them.

And yet . . .  

Even though we already know we need to eat more vegetables, decrease our sugar intake, and exercise to be healthy, we keep going back to quick-fix fad diets to lose weight.

And then . . .  

We have been taught to live on a budget and save money for a rainy day, but we still choose instant gratification, spending every last dollar garnished with a little bit of panic until our next paycheck comes. 

And even more . . . 

We know that “early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and wise,” but we consistently find reasons to keep our eyes open for just a few more minutes (and ultimately a few more hours) and wonder why we are dragging all day. 

It’s all just a little ridiculous. There have certainly been times I have looked at myself and my choices with the same sense of, “what the heck?” in my eyes as I viewed my daughter’s obstinate reaction so many years ago.

I know better. You know better. We all know better. And I believe we can do better

What proverbial eyelashes do you want to permanently remove from your eyes? 

As we fish them out . . . here’s something we might consider. Truth and Misery will come knocking at our doors on a daily basis. It’s part of our human experience. But when they do . . . we actually have a choice. What if we invite Truth in to unpack her bags and stay awhile, but leave Misery outside in the cold? It would just be better that way.

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But how do we invite Truth in? Especially when we’ve habitually entertained Misery for years?

I was chatting with my son-in-law this morning who essentially said this: “Truth leads you to your real purpose.” Let me tell you why I love this.

I had an “eyelash” stuck in my eye for decades. Rollercoaster weight. Or . . . we could call it  . . .  the Eyelash of Despair. Just sayin’. It was pretty awful.

Here’s the thing. The number on my bathroom scale went up twenty pounds and down twenty pounds almost every year since I was eleven years old. I chronically chose misery again and again. You and I talked earlier about the truths that surround a healthy weight. I’ve always known them. But, each year when I’d “had enough,” I chose a new extreme diet. 

I recently had a huge breakthrough, though. I invited Truth to live at my house. Hallelujah.

In other words . . . I considered my real purpose. My real purpose for wanting a lower number on the scale is my health. Honest. It isn’t to fit into a particular dress for a child’s wedding or to look socially acceptable at the swimming pool. (Though those are nice benefits.) What I want most is energy, endurance, flexibility, and to feel young enough to keep up with my adorable grandchildren. 

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As I have held this purpose . . . or truth . . . at the forefront of my mind, it has been so much easier to make good choices. To exercise, eat more vegetables, and lower my sugar intake. And though the numbers on the scale have lowered more slowly, this time they are decreasing for health.

So . . . when Truth and Misery demand that I choose between them, I ask questions like, 

“Is this really hunger?” 

“Do these French fries honor my body today?” 

“Do I even want a donut?”

“Is this a physical issue, or do I have an emotional need that could be met?” 

“What’s really going on here?”

Just an interesting side — I discovered a tendency I have to go for a snack when transitioning  from one activity to the next during the day. I’m not even hungry! I think I feel a little unbalanced when I’m unsure of my next step, so I eat something. Pretty useful information for sure. 

But let’s get back to the point. 

We want to get those prickly eyelashes out of our eyes? Right?

Here’s the deal. 

First, see the eyelash for what it is — a threat.

Next, clearly define what you really want — health; financial freedom; more energy from a good night’s sleep. Ask, “What is the real purpose of my goal?”

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Then, stay grounded in that Truth — setting up whatever reminders work best.

Finally, when Misery comes knocking again, see him for what he is, ask questions to invite Truth in, throw out the dang eyelash, and SLAM THE DOOR. 

For help removing those pesky lashes, ask yourself if you are ready to work with a personal coach. I’m here to help.